The problem is never the problem
Picture this: you're frustrated with your partner. They've loaded the dishwasher wrong, again, and they've left the door wide open for you to knock...
Do you find yourself worrying about what people think about you?
Do you choose what to wear, what to say or what you do with your life based on how you think other 'people' (usually nameless, faceless no-ones in your imagination) might react?
Here's a quick reminder:
People are tangled up in their stuff and have not noticed 99% of your choices. Stop trying to perfect your eyebrows; nobody cares.
There are some people in your life whose opinions matter to you. They're the ones you respect and actively seek the opinion of. You might have noticed something they share: they don't judge you for your thoughts, ideas or actions. They're in your corner, with your best interests at heart.
Some people in your life actively get off on saying negative sh*t about you. Those people are unlikely to say anything to your face and far more likely to talk to others instead. This is not the behaviour of someone who cares about you. So f**k what they think. You don't respect or care about their opinion, so why factor it in?
People who are healthy, happy and satisfied don't waste their energy worrying about what others are doing. They set great boundaries, provide support for people they love, and give advice when requested. They don't meddle, judge or poke holes - why would they?
Quickly think about people who've interfered in your life, made snarky comments or backstabbed you. Are they healthy, happy and satisfied?
No.
So why would you give any weight to their ideas? If they were so good at living, they'd be doing a better job of it themselves.
I hope this handy reminder helps someone this week.
Til next week,
A
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